Film Review
By: Junwoo Oh
In 1985, famous trading card company Topps released a new line of collectibles spoofing the “Cabbage Pail Kids” called “The Garbage Pail Kids”, featuring 1,000 dollar worth cards such as “Schizo Fran”, a two-headed female monstrosity parodying patients who suffer from Schizophrenia. It was Rod Amateau, a respectable director sued by his own wife for child support, who forever changed the bar of terrible abominations by producing, directing, and writing “The Garbage Pail Kids Movie,” the last film of his career.
These lovely cards are translated into various characters in the film, void of personality and any arc beyond fart jokes and urinating on the floor. My personal favorite is Ali-Gator, a carnivorous beast hell-bent on sniffing, licking, and eating the fleshy toes of unsuspecting mortals. A particularly jarring scene is when Ali-Gator breathes deeply and heavily next to teenage protagonist Dodger’s feet while he is taking a bath as other Garbage Pail Kids watch and comment.
“I am not sure how to organize my thoughts right now…I could have done without the scene where all of them are gathered around this tween’s bathtub and watching him try to get dressed as one of the female-coded puppets comments on his ‘nice legs’…that was the grossest bit,” reacted Ms. Rotem Penaloza-Bluvstein, SMHS’ resident English and Creative Writing teacher, upon watching the scene.
Somehow even more controversial than the cards themselves, the film constantly criticizes and belittles various members of our society. The plot is simple: Teenager Dodger, who wants to woo a fashion model, aids the Garbage Pail Kids in freeing their brethren from the clutches of the evil State Home for Ugly People. There is no message behind such a villain, a society dedicated to imprisoning “ugly people,” including the obese, the crippled, the hairy, and the bald.
This scene “showed the problems with the film. It alienated the audience and went to the extreme,” said Eitan Boaz, a junior at SMHS and an unfortunate witness of the film. “[I think] that this movie is aiming for some sort of ‘true beauty is within’ overall theme, but they just missed by like a solar system…that set up makes me think of the fugitive slave laws. It’s hard for me to wrap my mind around a movie that may actually be mocking disabled people,” stated Ms. Penaloza Bluvstein about the various imprisoned humans, especially regarding the “crippled” man. Executed most distastefully, Mr. Amateau’s script shames various body types all the while imprisoning them in barred crates deprived of any civil rights.
From a critical perspective, even more disturbing are the mesmerizing horrors of continuity errors. In the universe of “The Garbage Pail Kids Movie”, day turns into night in a matter of seconds, clothes disappear only to resurface moments later, and characters have the supernatural ability to teleport through the city. One of my favorite scenes in the film is created through masterful editing choices, where a character’s facial scar phases through time and space, appearing to the audience in some cuts but not in others.
Mr. Amateau rises to the occasion of social commentary as well in his creation. The romantic subplot is between a teenager and a literal adult; however, the writer flips the Hollywood stereotype by making the female an adult, instead of the usual ‘Lolita’ concept. Furthermore, the concept of bigoted prejudice and sexism against women is discussed by fully indulging in it throughout the film. The final reason Dodger rejects Tangerine, the female lead, is because he thinks she is “no longer pretty”. What an honorable way to fight against the patriarchy.
That being said, I could be completely wrong with my interpretation of the film. “The Garbage Pail Kids Movie” could’ve been ahead of its time. When various women’s clothes were torn off in this PG movie, it could’ve been commentary on the incurable bigoted notion of sexism which dominated, and still does, not just Hollywood, but the world as a whole. When a crippled man was sitting in a cage like a starved animal, it could’ve been depicting the cruelty of our society in its treatment of people who don’t fit into a white-washed beauty standard, and how difficult it will be to change that. When Ali-Gator opened his crocodile mouth to lick the toes of a minor, yelling at the top of his lungs, “It’s toe time!” it could’ve been saying, shouting, pleading for change to happen in our barbaric society, fighting for justice of various minorities through creative and poetic representation of the voiceless. Now that, that is peak cinema.
Production and Design Review
By: Abe Bredl
In 1987, “The Garbage Pail Kids Movie” was released on a budget of one million dollars. It earned roughly 1.6 million dollars in the box office. In the public’s eye, this movie was a nightmare. Parents protested the movie’s vulgar humor, resulting in the movie being taken down at theatres. It was so terrible, even by the standards of the late 80’s, that it was nominated for “Worst New Star”, “Worst Original Song”, and “Worst Visual Effects” during the 8th Golden Raspberry Awards.
“The Garbage Pail Kids Movie” is undoubtedly the needle in the haystack of bad movies. It is simply an eye-sore, the score seems both overproduced with electronic software and underproduced with creative lyrics. The costumes for the animatronic main protagonists seem well-produced in providing a sort of cartoonish aspect to their character, whereas the costumes for the human protagonists and antagonists of the movie seem hastily put together, and barely give insight on the character and their story.
Looking deeper at the film itself, student, artist, and musician Maya Dulnuan-Turner gave her feedback on the themes and technical aspects of the famed “Garbage Pail Kids Movie”. “This movie makes me feel extremely uncomfortable. The bad acting and the costumes made all the characters feel inhuman, giving the movie the same vibe as the feeling you get when you look at one of those liminal space photos,I think the costumes (especially the masks) are technically well-made: the skin on their faces looks real and moves like real skin when it’s interacted with; it is all very unsettling and I hate it very much.” Ms. Dulnuan-Turner says.
Just because this movie is heavily subjected to criticism, both from professional critics and amateur film-lovers does not mean that one shouldn’t experience the true message that can be inferred through this specific piece of media. “I think every Bearcat needs to see this movie once because, from what I saw in the five minutes I watched, it gave some insightful commentary on our current capitalist society. The garbage kids are a metaphor for the proletariat, who are being locked up in labour and oppression by the ruling class. This film does an excellent job showcasing how we, as working class children entering a corrupt society, must fight back against the one percent. the ruling class will never willingly give us their power. We are not complicit. we must take action now,” Ms. Dulnuan-Turner finally states.
This article is part of a series by Junwoo Oh and Abe Bredl.